Old Family Eggnog Recipe

Don’t buy the store kind;
homemade eggnog
is easy as falling
off an ice-covered log.

Of course you need eggs
the more eggs the better.
But try not to spill them
all over your sweater.

You can add half-and-half,
but I prefer cream,
With sugar and spice,
it’ll be just a dream!

Whip it up into
a rich bubbly froth.
Be careful! Don’t spill
on the nice tablecloth.

The spice must be nutmeg—
in a minute amount—
a spoonful will put you
flat down for the count.

And then add the brandy,
stir it in ad libitum,
and hand mugs to guests
at the door as you greet ‘em.

Now mix in some cognac,
and vodka, and rum:
Alcohol is what makes
Xmas parties so fun!

At the end of the party,
with your noggin a-reeling
you can watch winter stars
spin and swirl on your ceiling.

Afterward, in their bathrooms,
bent over the bowl,
your guests will beg Santa
to fill your stocking with coal.

© 2004 F.J. Bergmann

"Old Family Eggnog Recipe" appeared on asininepoetry.com

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